Some Home Truths
June 5, 2006
So I’ve been reading, with earnest, I might add, Big Slice of Life, Small Slice of Cheesecake. The author, Jenny, is quite honest about her weight, her struggles and her successes. I’ve decided to join her in her new lifestyle, since my own plots to fight the fat have stalled. I’ve also vowed to be very honest here, and I have a feeling this is it.
In October of 2005, I was at my heaviest: 217 pounds. At 5′7″, I carried it better than most women could, but I felt like absolute crap and besides not being able to wear practically anything properly, without tugging and adjusting constantly all day, I felt ashamed. Especially since I was an adorable (yet underweight) 118 pounds before I became pregnant with Dylan.
I started walking in October. I walked every day, for at least an hour, sometimes two. Thomas didn’t always like being in the stroller, but we made the most of it and I dropped pounds quickly. I went down to 198 pounds within 3 months. Breaking 200 was my first goal and I had done it! I was proud, though still not happy with my figure. At Christmastime, I started Troll Baby Graphics and pretty soon, I was swamped with new clients and advertising campaigns. Sitting on my ass for the majority of the day in front of this screen meant quick snacks, and skipping out on walking. I went back up to 202 within weeks. I got desperate.
The fruit cleanse fiasco that Sassy and I did together was not fun, nor did it help me much. I lost 5 pounds but gained it back very soon.
So here we are. June 5, 2006. I’ve already changed my diet to low fat, and I’ve gone from 202 to 192 just by doing that. If I can keep this low fat diet going, and walk every day again, I think I can win. I will log my steps at Woman Challenge. My goal? Long term - 130 pounds. Short term? 184 by my birthday, which is at the beginning of July, and hopefully I’ll be under 180 for the BlogHer Conference. That’s 2 pounds a week. I know that’s nuts to try and commit to 2 pounds a week, since 1 is more realistic, but I am deadly serious about this and want to get a good kick start.
Let’s face it, I’m not getting any younger. Carrying around these 60 extra pounds isn’t doing me any favours. Sure, it’s better than the extra 85 I was carrying. God that is alot of weight. It is going to take me a long time to hit publish on this post. I feel very ashamed, even now. Even though I’ve already lost 25 pounds on my own.
I need to get a bit selfish here. I need to take better care of myself. With heart disease, hypertension and diabeties running through both sides of my family, I’ve taken the first step of quitting smoking, and now it’s time to get serious about losing weight. Do, or Diabeties.
June 5th, 2006 at 8:35 am
Congrats on the weight loss so far. Please don’t be ashamed. We have all been there; believe me. Long story short. At one time I was 380+ (yes you read right)! While it opening a can of worms for some (and if you have something to say about it go to my blog, don’t flame me here please)I had gastric bypass surgery May 2002 and lost 150 pounds before getting pregnant with my daughter. After having my son 14 months after my daugher, I have hung on to 60 pounds and have fallen back into an unhealthy eating lifestyle. I really have to convince myself and go for the gusto so that I can get this weight off.
I too feel disgusting and have many pounds to shed. You can do it! Keep up the good work!
June 5th, 2006 at 8:41 am
Yay! Karen, you can totally do this.
June 5th, 2006 at 8:59 am
Elleoz - I don’t think anyone would flame you for having gastric-bypass. I don’t have a problem with people that have that surgery, especially if it means they will improve their life. I’m off to your blog to read more.
Jenny - thanks babe! You are such an inspiration!
June 5th, 2006 at 9:00 am
Elleoz - I do think the link to your blog is incorrect. You know, unless you’re 19 and have a son now….lol! Oops!
June 5th, 2006 at 10:57 am
I’m in a similar situation. I am 35, 5′7 & was 130 pre-preg. Baby boy is just shy of seven months and I can’t get below 165 no matter what I do. Went from a size 6 to a size 14. UGH! My preg had me on bed rest the last 3 months (and baby was 4 weeks early) and I was over 185 at his birth. Thanks to complications I now have hypertension (got bad pre-eclampsia which required early induction of baby) and I am type 1 diabetic (have been since 1994) and now on an insulin pump, I quit smoking when preg but have started again. I always eat fairly healthy but can’t squeeze in the exercise that I need anymore. Between working 40+/week plus the awful commute, taking care of home, yard, shopping, cooking, cleaning, hubby, and baby, I have little energy left for me. After all is done each day, I just want to curl up and take a nap, read a book, watch tv.
I have found that motivation has to be more than personal desire b/c as mom’s we (at least me) tend to put everyone and everything else before myself.
Could competition be a motive?
Two pounds a week sounds reasonable …
Any tricks or words you have to share, please do and I will do same.
Good luck! Christina
June 5th, 2006 at 11:11 am
You can do this! Strive for health and you’ll come out a winner!
June 5th, 2006 at 11:33 am
You looked amazing when you visited me, but I can understand that you don’t want to risk all those health problems. I’m cutting back on sugar myself there, because I often get light headed when eating anything sugary and I think thats one of the things Granny felt before she found out she had it.
And I love the new templete you made me, it’s rocking my socks!
June 5th, 2006 at 12:29 pm
karen- That is so awesome, first that you had the heart to share your struggles and second for doing all this for you and your family. They want a mommy that feels good too. I am in the same boat. Starting a babyboot camp this week. Wish US luck.
I know you will get there
June 5th, 2006 at 1:12 pm
Way to Go Karen!! I totally hear ya there… I was 110lbs pre pregnancy to my 1st daughter… That would be size 3 to now a size 14.. OMG… I am not sure what I weigh as I do not own a scale.. I would love to go back to 125lbs.. All the power to you!! You go Girl!!
Huggss
~A
June 5th, 2006 at 1:58 pm
I’m right here with ya babe!!! I struggle daily. Was doing quite well for a while an now stated going backwards again. Maybe you can keep me motivated!!!
Love ya!
Muahhhhhh
June 5th, 2006 at 2:21 pm
Good for you! I’m in a similar situation. At my highest weight, I was 245 (5′7″), and then lost a bunch of weight and I was 170 for my wedding and afterwards. Then after having Cordy I ballooned back up to 220, where I’ve been stuck.
Like you, I want to get this weight off, both for my own health, and to be a better role model to my child.
June 5th, 2006 at 2:57 pm
Thanks for laying your struggle and numbers out there. I couldn’t even tell you how much I weigh. I stand backwards on the scale at the doctor’s office. I have big ambitions for my post-partum exercise routine and a goal of fitting into a specific dress for a wedding in November. Weight is such an emotional ride. Ugh.
May you find the support you need in and outside of the computer to get yourself in a space that feels good.
June 5th, 2006 at 3:19 pm
You can do it! Exercising and eating less is struggle for many of us, I think. My lowest was 108 (size 2), and now I’m up to 174 and a size 12. The most difficult part is that I’ve lost so much self confidence as I’ve gained weight. I’m afraid that now all people see is a fat girl, rather than a smart, pretty one.
I wish that I felt healthy enough to exercise regularly again - as it is, it is so exhausting and embarassing. But I’m trying to get healthy again. You’re very brave to post about it, thanks for the inspiration!
June 5th, 2006 at 4:23 pm
Never feel ashamed. You have recognized the issue and are dealing with it. You can totally do this. I am a major Weight Watchers proponent - it’s worked for me - it’s good to have the support. But as you know, the key is exercise and healthy eating.
June 5th, 2006 at 4:50 pm
Thank you all for your support and your stories - I know I’m not alone in these feelings and it’s great to hear from all of you….thanks so much!
Karen
June 5th, 2006 at 4:54 pm
Good luck to you chick. I’m looking to lose an extra 20 lbs myself.
But at 5′7″, I’m sure you could probably pull off 150 very nicely? 130 would be very tiny, no?
In any case, best of luck! I’ll be thinking of you while I’m out walking too. This stuff is HARD!
June 5th, 2006 at 6:38 pm
Congratulations! I know you can do it. I am quite a bit heavier than I was 10 years ago, before children. I do not know how old you are, but I will tell you the weight challenge increases as you get older (I am 43). So, doing it now is great.
In the past two years I have become a fairly dedicated runner (half marathon last year) and yoga and gym (boxing) junkie. Cheaper than therapy I say……..
And although my pounds have not come off as I am not disciplined enough to curb my snacking, I do feel much better about myself.
Keep going, and look to others for motivation!
Your children will totally admire your dedication!
AC
June 5th, 2006 at 8:39 pm
Do it! Do it! Do it!
I tell you, I’ve always had success by limiting what I eat after 3:30 or 4:00. Difficult with kids, but it works.
Hey, I have a fat poem on my blog right now. Maybe you’ll find it cathartic.
June 5th, 2006 at 8:53 pm
good for you sister, just started WW last week and I’m ready to chew my arm off. But, I really need to cut down, gained 25lbs! in ONE YEAR!! HOW THE HELL IS THAT POSSIBLE?
OH, i guess eating malt balls after 10pm while watching tv doesn’t help! Good luck!
June 6th, 2006 at 9:01 am
Whoops! Don’t know what that was all about. I fixed my blog address if you are still interested in visiting. One of these days I am so totally going to get you to make a blog for me. Gotta save up so dough first though.
As far as the flaming~ You would be surprised at the number of “comments” I get when it comes up. There are a lot of people out there that see it as an easy way out. Believe me…it is not easy. I’ll try to discuss it in my blog soon and include some before and after pics.
You can doooo it!
June 6th, 2006 at 10:32 am
I applaud your honesty, and I know you can overcome and lose the weight you are determined to lose!!
June 6th, 2006 at 10:58 pm
I totally understand and know the frustration, and the emotional coasterride about weightloss. I also know you are a strong person, and you’ll do it, if you put your mind to it. Look at me? Never thought I could do it, but I am. It’s far from easy, but worth the great inner feeling!
Keep up the “hard” work. You have our support!
Love ya!
Nicole
June 7th, 2006 at 4:26 pm
That’s great that you’ve already started it! Good luck going further. I know that I need to get off my fat ass and do something….I dunno why I don’t have the motivation though. Bleh…someday!
June 8th, 2006 at 12:32 am
There’s no shame in this at all. You’ll do it, I know you will. And you deserve to take care of yourself! Plus I wanna grow old with you….well not in a lesbian way but you know what I mean! LOL! Love ya bizatch!
June 14th, 2006 at 8:36 am
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