The Interview
April 24, 2007
I asked Karl if I could participate in The Interview thing that is going around and after getting all bitchy bantering over his choice of questions (no, I will not rub your feet at BlogHer, dammit), we finally settled on these and so here goes nothing.
1. Name three places you haven’t yet visited that you’d love to go.
Three? Shit. Already I’m struggling, because there really is only one that steals my heart every time I think about it. Africa. I want to spend a year in Africa, learning everything I can about the animals, the people, the culture, the music, the plant life. I want to dance with African people, and learn to speak their languages. I want to learn crafts with the children, and teach them whatever I could possibly offer. I think Africa is the most beautiful place in the world and I want to see every single square foot of it. Someday…
As for two more…Australia is high on the list, for the same reasons…to learn culture. I’ve also always been curious about Japan, because they have really fucked up game shows, and everything seems so absolutely surreal there. I want to see that for myself. Hello, Kitty? Hook me up!
2. What are your favorite things about your hometown?
I was born in Toronto and lived in and around Toronto most of my life. The best memories I have all have to do with good friends, some of whom I have reunited with through Facebook, and as a young adult, I loved the diversity and excitement of downtown. For this reason, I think I would LOVE New York. Maybe one day I’ll go visit Liz and make that a reality. You know, when she is done with the breastfeeding and we can go get drunk.
3. Do you have any methods/tricks for stimulating your creativity?
With the graphics, sometimes it flows and sometimes I get really frustrated with myself. If I’m working on a blog, I often read nearly the whole thing to get a sense of the person. It’s time consuming, but it’s how I fell in love with some of my favorites too.
With writing, not this entire blog, but real, heartfelt writing…I have to be really in love with the subject, or very emotional about it. My most passionate entries are all about the emotions, like most people.
4. Are there any songs that get you teary eyed?
- To Make You Feel My Love - Billy Joel (our wedding song)
- Daughter, Pearl Jam (but that is more of an angry cry)
- Call Me When You’re Sober, Evanesence (ironically, only when I’m drunk - it reminds me of my mother)
- Good Enough, Sarah McLachlin (also reminds me of my mother)
5. What television shows are you embarrassed to admit you watch?
I really don’t watch much t.v. anymore. ER is the only one I won’t miss, ever.
The sad part is, I can easily waste an hour or two, on YouTube looking for fucked up Japanese Game Shows.
I’m still figuring that out, actually, and I vetoed the question because it made me cringe. Not a lot of people like admitting when they aren’t feeling strong and I’m certainly one of them. I know there are people who will read this site and criticize me for blogging my weaknesses. They will take what shakes my inner core and shove my nose in it, like I’m some dog who has shit on their carpet. In spite of them, I keep writing. One of the greatest things Daren has taught me (and I’m still learning) is to not care what people think of me.
Truth be told, “My Depression” isn’t something I’ve actually called “My Depression” before and when Karl wrote that question, he had no idea the impact it would have on my psyche. I read that question and stopped breathing. Silent tears ran down my face. All of a sudden, I had to own this two letter phrase, call it my own?
Needless to say, I wasn’t ready for what was next.
I was angry. With Karl. He didn’t even know it.
Sure, I had PPD, once upon a time. I own that, but that was then and this is now and I was pissed that Karl made me swallow “My Depression.” I don’t even know if I have depression. And if I do, why don’t I know it yet? Why did I refuse drugs? If Karl thinks I have “My Depression,” then maybe I do!
Except I didn’t think so. And I don’t think so. I’m starting to think that depression is the most over-diagnosed thing since ADD. I mean, EVERYONE has bad days. EVERYONE.
Yes, I am going through something that I can’t explain as anything other than stupidity, with a sprinkle of shame. But anorexia is just that, for me. It doesn’t mean I’m depressed. In fact, most days, I’m pretty happy. Even keel. I wasn’t a few weeks ago, but I am now. I’m mostly fine. And this time, I mean it. No Britney Spears air-quotes around that word.
April 24th, 2007 at 6:43 am
Keep eating slowly. I’m with you. You have to ramp up slowly or it won’t last.
April 24th, 2007 at 7:33 am
Well you are welcome to visit NY any time! And if you want to read more about Africa, you have to visit my bf’s blog since she’s living in Tanzania for two years with her toddler twins. Fascinating.
April 24th, 2007 at 3:06 pm
Oh that insensitive bastard! I think that those of us that do have depression seem to talk about it like it’s no big thing, because well..it isn’t. However we also want to induct people into a club that they just not might belong in, so you know….
“To Make You Feel My Love” is one of the most beautiful songs…ever.
April 24th, 2007 at 8:04 pm
Aha so you did do the interview style question things, except I didn’t get to interview you lol. Oh well.
Guess what? Mom has a blog now. I’m not too sure if she’s going to ever use it…but its http://twentyfiveroses.wordpress.com. hah.
April 27th, 2007 at 2:58 am
Ack, I still feel bad. I honestly made a goof, thinking you’d already acknowledged the depression thing. I didn’t realize you were still sorting things out. My bad.
April 30th, 2007 at 10:52 am
“A fresh look at Japan, by gaijins for gaijins!”
http://www.stippy.com/