Fear And Loathing In Real Estate
October 4, 2007
Our house is off the market. Unfortunately I had to play the hard-ass of late and fire our agent before the contract was even up. The mistakes that were made, the lies we were told and the final straw, an email forward filled with naked men from him to me, was the icing on the hot mess that was this proverbial cake.
You know, we’ve learned a lot from this. We’re waiting on final paperwork to ensure the agent and the company he works for can’t come after us for commission should we sell this house on our own or with the help of a new agent. In the meantime, I’ve dropped a small fortune on boxes and I’m packing our summer gear and clothing to haul off to storage in preparation for moving, (hopefully be in the next 6 months?)
The house we have our eyes on now isn’t a house at all. The builder is still offering to build us a house, but we are forced to wait until the sale of this house happens. The build will take 120-150 days so even if we sell the house in the next month, we’re looking at spring before we move.
To say we’re frustrated is an understatement and this weekend we will decide how we are going to approach this situation if at all, the alternative being a long wait until spring to list again, when the market will be kinder to a house that sits on an awkward lot. (The lot is what is stopping people from buying, the house itself is great)
About the agent - he was someone we considered an acquaintance when we hired him for the 2nd time. He was our agent when we bought this house 5 years ago and back then, was professional, hard-working and attentive. This time around was so much different, I’m sure we were dealing with the polar opposite of what we thought.
With us already frustrated, he decided that instead of replying to my email requesting a follow up on a small matter, that he would send me an email full of images of naked men.
I’m no prude, but considering the fact that he had dropped the ball several times before, and that I was waiting for follow up to move forward on this stupid house, it royally pissed me off that he had time to send me an email full of nudity but not to send me the answer to a perfectly normal question a WEEK after I had expected it. Not to mention, it’s fucking creepy as hell to get naked man pictures from your real estate agent, no?
Needless to say, I was thinking, What. The. Fuck?
The gloves came off. I shot back a quick one-line reply that simply asked, “When is our contract up with your company?”
After phone calls and an email apologizing for “offending me,” both of which I ignored, I toiled between reporting him to his boss or reporting him to the Real Estate Board, but definitely we were done with this whole situation and that was only reaffirmed when he showed up the next day, unannounced, to collect his sign and apologize in person. He had sent the wrong form to my email to cancel the listing and I informed him of that. There were promises to send the right form, but when it arrived in my inbox, it too bound us for 60 days to the company sooooo I amended it, faxed it in, with a cover letter stating that if they would not comply in cutting all ties, we would indeed go to the Board and report them. Oh and get this form back to us within 48 hours, thank you very much.
Further to that, his boss? Never ever contacted me! He sent my messages back to the agent. You would THINK that an office manager would want to apologize on behalf of his staff member, that he would do everything in his power to ensure that we don’t come after them for sexual harassment or whatever, but no ~ I was completely ignored.
The son-of-a-bitch agent texted me yesterday, basically calling me a liar because I “must have a buyer” (we do not) and how “honesty is the best policy when conducting business.”
OH HELLS NO.
I am not the one who dug this hole, and now I’m deciding whether to report him to the Board anyway. Daren feels we should, but my trepidation lies with the fact that I would much rather concentrate on selling the house than fight with this agent who clearly needs to learn tact, professionalism, accountability and the fine art of learning when to keep your accusatory thoughts to yourself.
October 4th, 2007 at 2:13 pm
Unbelievable. You handled it much better than I would have.
FYI–you can and should put in your next contract that it can be terminated with only 24 hours notice. Any good real estate agent will know this and not be unwilling to work with you. I know that maybe doesn’t help you now but in the future.
Best of luck to you.
October 4th, 2007 at 2:14 pm
I’d report him to the Board. Hell, I’d like to report him to the Board FOR you.
It totally sucks big hairy monkey balls. (Maybe you should send the agent a visual aid to convey how you found his services?)
October 4th, 2007 at 2:34 pm
Report the asshole. This douchebag could be doing this crap to other people, too! He doesn’t deserve to have a license, and it’s just creepy as hell!
October 4th, 2007 at 2:49 pm
So ehm.. the email with naked men was a bad thing?
Just kidding! What an ASSHOLE!!! You are so right to fire his sorry ass!
October 4th, 2007 at 3:09 pm
I would report him. I understand your hesitancy, but just think of him feeling he is vindicated somehow and then going on to do this to other people? He obviously has moral flexibilities and some questionable mental health. It sucks to get tangled up in that, I know…but the next people he deals with would thank you.
October 4th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
I think you should take the e-mail thing much, much further as he shouldn’t get away with doing something like that.
What if he does it again only to a woman on her own? or someone who opens what is obviously official house business with young children on her lap & they see it too.
October 4th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
Also I think a new contract should have “if a request is not acknowledged within 48 hours, and dealt with or reasons given why not in 3 days this contract shall be considered cancelled with no ramifications”
Oh, and the old “we will not send pornographic images to clients” chestnut!
October 4th, 2007 at 4:21 pm
AAAAAAAAAGH — what a terrible story! Report his ass.
I know you have a lot going on, but you’re a great person to help keep this from happening to someone else. Someone else who might not be as strong and capable as you are. Rock on.
October 4th, 2007 at 4:28 pm
October 4th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
I’d get that doc signed, write a full report on his behavior, and send that report to the Board. CC both your agent and his manager.
Be sure to detail the entire process, that he has been professional in the past, this time was different, that you don’t (at this time) have a buyer or any prospects, and that you simply don’t want this individual representing you.
October 4th, 2007 at 4:38 pm
October 4th, 2007 at 4:49 pm
So the men? Were they ugly or what? Oh I’m KIDDING. He sounds like a prick. I’d totally report him.
October 4th, 2007 at 5:06 pm
Hi there - I went through hell with a mortgage broker and realtor (who recommended him) who jerked me around for two months, finally didn’t approve the loan based on self-employment, and then left me threatening messages asking for the 400 bucks for house inspection that he had apparently fronted without my okay.
I gave it to him because he made me so nervous. I had to go to mediation because the sellers were angry, justifiably so, but I was going broke and couldn’t afford to give up my escrow money without a fight. It got split down the middle.
I was so exhausted and upset by the end that I didn’t report him. I honestly believe that he took advantage of me, and much of it happened because I was a single woman dealing with him, who didn’t know HALF of what I know now about the process of purchasing a house. I don’t trust anyone at face value in that process anymore, and when I go for it again I’ll know how to proceed (I think!) But it scares me that these people are out there. The realtors’ board of ethics exists for these reasons…That was crappy, unnecessary,a nd professionally stupid behavior on your realtor’s part, and I’m with everyone else who suggests reporting him. Buying and selling houses is one of the most important transactions in life. It shouldn’t be handled poorly by people who are supposed to be helping you (even though they get paid.)
October 4th, 2007 at 7:30 pm
OMG. That sucks so bad. Makes me glad that I have an uncle in the biz around here. I don’t think we are getting dicked around, but you can’t tell sometimes until it is too late. Good luck getting it all squared away.
October 4th, 2007 at 8:16 pm
Here is the thing - I would not worry about the retarded email that he sent you - that really wont help you, to be honest with you. I would report him for A.) not doing his fiduciary duty to YOU and B.) Not releasing you from your contract like you requested. Don’t take it that just because he removed his sign that you are released from owing a commission IF you do sell your home. If you should happen to get a buyer lets say in a month or so (I have no idea when your contract is up?) You could still owe a commission. You have to get it in writing that as of such and such of date there is NO re-list obligation and you want your home taken off MLS AND your contract is to be null in void. IF you don’t get this signed by him or his manager or broker - you might still owe.
Just like a contract to sell your home, you get that in writing - get this in writing to. I would absolutely write a letter to his manager/broker of the reasons why - NOT an email but a registered snail mail letter, stating the fact that you want to be released.
Having too many people signing a release will never hurt.
Reporting him to the Board, might just fall on deaf ears, but it will leave a paper trail should he ever try to fight you on anything.
October 4th, 2007 at 9:11 pm
What an idiot!! Realtors do so much business on referral.
Report his ass. NOW!!
October 4th, 2007 at 10:00 pm
Report him. You’ve dealt with enough crap, and by reporting him, you can both stop future harassment, AND save others from having to deal with him. Don’t be kind, just do it. Think of the headaches you’re saving some other nice person…
So sorry you’ve had to deal with this crap. Super glad you posted about it, though - the cryptic Twitter messages were making me incredibly curious!
October 5th, 2007 at 3:11 am
Hmm…I know you don’t want to ruin someone’s life, and you are showing a lot of compassion for even waiting to think through reporting him, but a house is one of the most important things in a person’s existence.
NO ONE should have to deal with this man with such a valuable thing.
He sucks a duck and so does his boss.
October 5th, 2007 at 3:25 am
I would report him anyway. What the frig? If you don’t report what he did (I hope you kept the email) then they could conceivably come back at you for commission in this regard. Cover your ass. The hell with nice.
October 5th, 2007 at 8:38 am
I swear to God, is the buying and selling of houses ever NOT a ginormous pain in the ass? I have actually put off the idea of moving because I can’t stomach the thought of it right now. I’d report the guy. He sounds so dense that he probably won’t get the message any other way.
October 5th, 2007 at 10:58 am
OMFG.
How professional.
I sure hope you saved that email. Which I’m sure you did.
I’d report him too. Dumbass.
October 5th, 2007 at 11:40 am
I’m sure you’re giving this guy FAR more consideration than he’d ever dream of giving you.
Just make sure you cover your ass as much as possible, as others have stated. I’d be dropping paper trails in every conceivable direction to make sure he can’t come after a commission when you do sell your house. Because I’m sure he would take whatever he could get from you.
Good luck!
October 5th, 2007 at 12:16 pm
Karen, am I reading this right? He sent you an email that contained images of naked men?
This is your agent we’re talking about? And you haven’t reported him to the board already?
Do it. That’s just…unbelievable.
October 5th, 2007 at 12:30 pm
Pretty busy this weekend so it’ll have to wait, plus we don’t have that paper back yet making sure we’re covered, another reason not to do anything till we’re covered.
Thanks everyone - at least I know I’m not being unreasonable and I was right to be offended. I just want to cover our asses totally, then I’ll probably follow your advice.
Karen
October 5th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
Hi,
See your comment right there at the end. Just wanted to chime in with the unbelievable unbelievability of this mess. I think I would report him just to get a paper trail going - he sounds completely off his nut, and protecting yourself with paper could not hurt.
October 5th, 2007 at 2:13 pm
God, some real estate agents are just slimier than used car salesmen! I had ONE once and she was AMAZING. But a lot of them out there (even ones that are fairly good) alls they have in their eyes are those “giant commission” dollar signs. I would definitely hold that naked e-mail over his head until you get let out of the contract.
October 5th, 2007 at 2:59 pm
some listing contracts also have a stipulation that if you sell within x-number of months after your contract ends, you still have to pay the agent a commission. The reasoning behind this is that some of the advertising the agent did before the contract expired could have indirectly led to the sale. Make sure that that part of the contract is nulled as well. Anyway, sorry you are in such a sucky situation, good luck finding a better agent and getting your house sold.
October 5th, 2007 at 3:35 pm
forward his email to his boss. make sure he sees that the email was forwarded to you from him…. good luck! im on the other side of the real estate thing. the house that im living in is for sale. 1.2 million dollars. cheap for where we live! but its always a pain in the ass to get the house ready when we get the call the day before. we are supposed to get more notice but we would like to see the house sell for him.(our landlord is super cool.) but its hard to nuke the house when two adults, two children and two dogs are living in it…. its been over a year that ive been there and weve had a handfull of people look at it and this agents contract is almost up! so im sure there will be a whole new surge of activity soon.
October 5th, 2007 at 6:02 pm
Report him. He took the gloves off 1st by acusing you of lying. I hope you saved the text. I would include it in your letter.
October 5th, 2007 at 10:23 pm
we went through something similar. severed ties, moved on. he was just as happy to get rid of us as we were of him (and now we don’t own the abestos filled house he was trying to convince us to buy!)
October 6th, 2007 at 10:17 am
Oh…I hear you. Trying to sell a house is stressful enough without having this kind of thing happen. I recently referred to similar incidents in two different real estate transactions in this post:
http://dibookblogetc.typepad.com/my_weblog/2007/08/weve-come-a-lon.html
What struck me, and frankly pissed me off, is that until my husband got involved I was treated dismissively and demeaningly. In one case, our realtor had gone on vacation assuring me that her assistant was handling showings. I happened to be talking to another realtor friend and she said, “One of the agents in my office wanted to show your house and couldn’t get hold of your agent for access.” It turns out my agent was on a cruise in Europe, was not returning voice mails and her voice mail had no indication that the caller should call her assistant to set up a showing.
I spoke to the office manager and was given the same line about the contract, etc. Then my husband called and everyone’s tune changed.
I am afraid to say that I still think that when it comes to business transactions, women are assumed to be able to be pushed around and bullied into submission. That’s not me. I try to remain calm and non-threatening…but I’m gradually learning that the only way some people are going to take me seriously is if I turn on the bad-ass and threaten a lawsuit, then someone might say, “Hey, this chick knows what she’s talking about.”
Best of luck with it. I have two houses on the market right now and if at least one would sell, the Valium consumption at my house would drop by at least…well, 10%
October 7th, 2007 at 9:44 pm
Personally, I think you should take it to the board. I know you want to focus on selling the house, but I worry about the legal crap.
That’s totally creepy about the naked men email! Omg. I hope you still have it in your inbox and can print it off to show the boss…completely unprofessional and creepy.
Get Daren to beat him up.
October 8th, 2007 at 11:18 am
*hugs*
I have no advice here. Although I know I personally would probably report him because this is just wrong.
Anyway,
I hope you figure out what is right for you guys and solve the dilemma
October 8th, 2007 at 1:04 pm
Whoa! He sent you pictures of naked men???!!! That is so wrong, and even worse since you were waiting on a REAL response from him. I understand not reporting since it probably would end his real estate career, but I am mean and would do it anyway.
Hope you next jaunt in real estate is less creepy.
October 8th, 2007 at 1:18 pm
I’d totally report him.
October 9th, 2007 at 12:37 am
All right, not all men are horrible. But spot on friends…when it comes to business, unless you PROVE it straight up that you are no-nonsense, take no crap, smart as a whip…be prepared to be pushed around….as a woman. And even then, it is questionable.
In your decision making, you are thinking emotionally and not paying much attention to your objective side. Objectively, this person did not fulfull the requirements of the contract THAT YOU BOTH SIGNED. And after that, he also chose to also abuse or offend or harass you. You pick the verb.
In all of the reasons thus far, you have said…he has apologized, you don’t need to ruin his career. Well, this person CHOSE not to do his job. He then CHOSE to send you offensive material. At which point is it ok? I believe it is HIM ruining his own career.
Do the right thing. If not for you, then think about the next person he harasses. That could be your kid, all grown up…
October 9th, 2007 at 1:09 am
[...] See it here? [...]
October 9th, 2007 at 7:25 am
There is no question that you should report him and include all of the information from the text msgs, written documentation of the phone calls you’ve received and copies of all e-mails they’ve sent you. He disrespected you and is now blaming YOU for all of it. You owe him nothing and he deserves to be called out.
That’s absolute bullshit.
Melanie
October 10th, 2007 at 1:45 pm
Wow. What an idiot. Who does that?!
I guess it depends on whether or not you want to spend your time dealing with an idiot anymore.
The guy is digging his own grave already it sounds like.
That’s a tough one. Good luck my friend.
Jamie
October 13th, 2007 at 4:32 pm
Excuse me a moment…
BWAH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!
*GASP*
A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*GASP*
A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*GASP*
A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*GASP*
A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*GASP*
OK, I’m back.
You should do whatever you can to ruin this bastard’s career now, or what’s going to happen when he takes it even further the next time?
Sounds like his boss needs his license revoked, too.
October 13th, 2007 at 4:33 pm
Er…
I was laughing at their incomparable stupidity, not your unfortunate experience.
October 17th, 2007 at 5:26 pm
I’m sorry. That really sucks. It’s amazing how your realtor can be so great when you are BUYING a house and then turn into a complete ass when you are SELLING. That is what happened to me and it was a real eye-opener. Selling house a sucks.