February 19th Is Male PMS Day, FYI
February 21, 2008
The other day I took both kids to the grocery store and it was fairly busy. We were shopping for the ingredients for chili and I was kind of in a rush but knew Thomas would rather walk then ride in the cart so I took a deep breath and tried to relax about the situation.
You see, I had promised Daren’s Grandmother I would make chili and bring it over that night, but they eat at 4:30 every night and it was already noon, so I was cutting it close since the chili takes 3 hours to make.
(I’ll post the recipe later - it is a baked chili and oh-so-yummy!)
Once in the store, Dylan wanted to deposit his allowance into the bank machine. I waited off to the side while he put his cash in an envelope on the counter directly beside the bank machine. He was about to step (it’s literally one step) over to the machine and this man barged in ahead of him. He looked at me in defeat and I said, “Come here and stand in line Dylan and wait your turn AGAIN. How RUDE.”
I put my arm around him and we waited in silence.
The man ignored my comment, never once looking up or acknowledging that he was a total douchenozzle for butting ahead of a 9 year old kid.
Whatever. Life is too short, right?
Dylan took his turn at the machine, and we cruised the grocery store at toddler-speed, checking things off the list with me repeating “over here Thomas, come here Thomas,” a lot because 3 years old are like slack-jawed nomads in such a stimulating setting as the grocery store, and I’m quite fond of my slack-jawed nomad, don’t ya know.
I found myself enjoying this task with my kids, talking to them about whatever, and holding their hands a little.
In one of the aisles, Thomas got turned around and ended up standing beside some man’s cart.
“Mommy’s over here Thomas,” I said. He looked up and realized where he was and came back to me, smiling.
The man looked at me and laughed. I smiled at him, thinking he once had kids and he understood or he thought my kid was cute or whatever.
“Oh I’m not laughing with you,” he snarled, “I’m laughing AT you.”
“Uh..pardon me?” I asked.
He repeated himself and added, “I used to have some of those too.”
(those? they aren’t plantar’s warts, they’re children, dickface.)
“Kids?” I asked.
“Yeah. And thank God, they grew up and moved out. Now I’m laughing at you because you’re still there.”
I wasn’t sure what to make of this guy. It’s like when I had Thomas and there was a woman on my ward who very clearly did not want her baby and she cried and screamed so much. It was unnerving. Strange. Foreign.
“Well I love it, ” I smiled.
“No you don’t,” he challenged.
“Yes, I really do love being a Mom,” I insisted.
“No you don’t,” He smirked.
I started to walk away, holding Thomas’ hand and placing Dylan’s on the cart in an effort to get away from this bitter man.
He called after me. “You WAIT till they move out. You’ll LOVE it when they are GONE.”
(okay crazy man, you can shut up now. you’re scaring my kids.)
I was halfway across the store with the boys when Dylan asked, “What did that man mean?”
I explained what I thought the man meant, and told Dylan that I indeed loved being a Mom no matter what the man meant by his tirade.
“I know you do Mom. You can tell the way your eyes go when you look at us. All watery and sparkly.”
“Awww, that’s sweet honey,” I replied, putting my arm around his shoulders again.
He smiled up at me. “That guy didn’t know anything.”
“Oh Dylan. Maybe he just doesn’t know love.”
“Yeah well, he won’t ever know love with a heart like that.”
Wow. 9 years old and already so smart and perceptive.
I really do love being a Mom, and that caustic old man might not believe it, but he just drove the point home.
February 21st, 2008 at 2:19 pm
Unfortunately stupidity usually goes along with rudeness. My wife probably would have kicked him in the nuts.
Kemp’s last blog post..OH YEAHHHHHHH
February 21st, 2008 at 2:23 pm
Yep, that is one perceptive kid you’ve got there. So sweet.
One time, a number of years ago, we went to a Friday night Lenten fish fry at the Catholic school my oldest attended at the time. My husband and I were doing the kid wrangling, and an older couple, just leaving, stopped by our table and said something along the lines of, “You have a lovely family, it reminds us of ours when we were your age. Cherish this stage of your life.”
And then I cried. I still had to try to stop them from spilling soda on their fish, but still.
Peggasus’s last blog post..You’ve Got Mail! (Part the First)
February 21st, 2008 at 2:30 pm
Kids usually know what’s best. And you’ve got a really sweet kid. And I laughed at what the guy said — because I thought he just sounded like an idiot.
Dagny’s last blog post..I win…
February 21st, 2008 at 3:31 pm
I may not like kids, and I really don’t want to be around them, but I would never, NEVER!!! tell a parent how they feel about their children or being a parent. What a mean old man. I’m sure his kids RAN from his home, and since he’s at the grocery store himself, their mother probably did, too. What a dickface.
February 21st, 2008 at 5:16 pm
…are you kidding with that story? that guy is a real whack-job! what a weirdo to have a conversation like that with a total stranger. you can only imagine what kind of dad he must have been; real dialed in with his kids. sheesh. what a loser.
Beth B. (tired mommy to a busy 4.5 yr old)
February 21st, 2008 at 5:24 pm
That’s just so… HORRIBLE! I bet he eats kittens, too. I would have been fighting myself to not punch him.
February 21st, 2008 at 5:31 pm
What a nasty old grump. I’m glad your son handled it well- what a smart kiddo!
February 21st, 2008 at 5:39 pm
That is just so darn sweet! That grumpy old man was in the right place at the right time, or else you may have never heard such a wonderful thing from your son.
Crazy Lady in Vegas’s last blog post..Pimp my Beagle
February 21st, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Wow, that second guy has some serious issues, and needs to stop pushing his issues on other people!
Luckily, you’ve got a very intuitive and sweet son who won’t let that guy get you down.
Christina’s last blog post..Exercise, Or How To Prove I No Longer Have The Knees Of A 21 Year Old
February 21st, 2008 at 8:03 pm
Oh my goodness? That is absolutely mind-blowing. The worst I’ve ever had happen was a woman said my daughter needed a smack upside the head because she was crying. My husband is the one who heard it as I was somewhere else, but I ended up searching her out and asking if she had children. She said no, she didn’t want them.
Good thing too, those kids would be miserable.
Doesn’t stuff like this just make you feel sorry for that person’s kids?
Sleeping Mommy’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen Childhood Memories
February 21st, 2008 at 8:41 pm
That is so sweet.
About the only thing that would have made it better is if the kid, after the jerk said ‘GONE,’ would look quizzically at him and ask, to you, “Mommy? Is this what a pessimist looks like?”
Or
“Mom? Can I give this man a hug? He sounds like he’s never got one, and I have extras”
Or
“Mister, your black heart hurts my eyes”
whall’s last blog post..Spending and greed
February 21st, 2008 at 8:47 pm
I feel very sorry for that man’s kids, because I doubt they got very much love growing up. And I feel sorry for him, too, because he is bitter and alone. But awww, what Dylan said about your eyes, that was so sweet! Too bad that grumpy old man didn’t have YOU for a Mom
Elizabeth’s last blog post..Operation “Get My Butt To BlogHer” Has Begun!
February 21st, 2008 at 10:35 pm
Awwwwwww! Now I’m all “watery and sparkly” too!
Tense Teacher’s last blog post..Awww, I Love Y?all!
February 22nd, 2008 at 12:49 am
Omigosh your Dylan is perceptive and sweet. And your slack-jawed nomad, too, I’m sure. I wonder if Dylan will remember that years from now. It’s very cool that he knows exactly how you feel about him and his brother and that he could recognize a visitor from the Twilight Zone and not take him seriously.
Violet the Verbose’s last blog post..For the Record, My Kids are Crazy
February 22nd, 2008 at 1:12 am
Your sweet kids are proof that you are a great mom.
Suebob’s last blog post..Hillary’s Scary Idea
February 22nd, 2008 at 4:11 am
wow. that guy really IS a dickface! kudos to dylan for knowing how to rise above it.
janet’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: the start over edition
February 22nd, 2008 at 6:19 am
Oh wow - how did that guy end up sharing the planet with us? I agree with someone above - his poor children, I hope they have seen enough people with decent families to know NEVER to emulate their own old man, and it might be an idea to not visit grandpa too often.
jeanie’s last blog post..Five get down in Paradise
February 22nd, 2008 at 8:46 am
Now that is just plain WEIRD. Rude and insensitive people are just unhappy with themselves. KUdos to you for standing your ground and not getting nasty.
I sure would have!
This Mom’s last blog post..Debt Freedom Friday: 2/22/08
February 22nd, 2008 at 11:10 am
All I can say is what a dick! It’s one thing to be unhappy with your own life, but to thrust it upon strangers is just plain rude. I would have kicked the old guy where it counts and then told him I was laughing AT him too:)
Lisa’s last blog post..Sleet, Snow and Freezing Rain…..Oh My!!
February 22nd, 2008 at 1:30 pm
ohmigod. i love dylan!
ali’s last blog post..dancing nannies and happy mommies
February 22nd, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Ew. Just… ew.
Did you grab one of those sani-napkins to cleanse the boys of the pukiness afterwards?
Miss Britt’s last blog post..A Letter To My Body
February 23rd, 2008 at 8:30 pm
Are you kidding me? What an ass.
You should be very proud of your little man, so grown up he sounded!
Mrs. Schmitty’s last blog post..Way Too Much On My Plate!
February 24th, 2008 at 6:30 am
Wow, I didn’t think so many idiots could be at the same place same time. I suspect his kids left and he’s never heard from them again…they were probably tortured….
There is no better love then that of a child. And you are an angel…
Let the world kiss your bottom…if they don’t get it. While going through a bad bout with chemo this month all I could think of was the love of my husband, daughter and grandchildren..and family..now can that be wrong. Just got me through a pretty tough time..
Screw the jerk….
my best to you…
Dorothy from grammology
remember to call gram
Dorothy Stahlnecker’s last blog post..Websites to share with the Grandchildren Guest Post Maryan Pelland
February 25th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
What is wrong with people? Seriously! I do believe there are two kinds of people in the world. One like you and I where we actually do love our kids and enjoy being their parent, and then other kind (like my parents and that man) who have kids because it is “what you do” and count the days until they are “rid of them”. Thank goodness we are in the group we are in!
tori’s last blog post..Maybe I’m the One Who Is the Paranoid Flake-Oh….Yeah*
March 1st, 2008 at 11:03 pm
Wow. totally rude jerks! I loooove the douche nozzle thing!
Dana’s last blog post..Lucky
March 7th, 2008 at 6:27 pm
It’s really sad that the gentleman’s defining moment as a parent was when his children moved out. But so incredible that your son is already so wise!
Kristin DeLoach, Graco’s last blog post..Changing the World, One Car Seat at a Time
March 15th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
What an ass!
Your son is wise beyond his years
Jules’s last blog post..I Won! I Won!