Supporting Your Community
April 29, 2008
I hate the guys
who criticize
and minimize
the other guys
who’s enterprise
has made them rise
above the guys
who criticize.~ Unknown (my Grade 8 principal said it in an assembly and it stuck with me - if you know the author, please comment or email me and I’ll put it in!)
~ Christina said most what I’d like to say, (a hell of a lot nicer than I could have.)
I’ve had a nagging post in my head for the last week or so, as I watched blogger after blogger announce the birth of books, get recognized for their various crafts in various forms of media, work to support each other and create wonderful things together.
Not once was I jealous. Hell I barely have time to wipe my ass, never mind pen a book or jet across the border to be on television.
No, instead I was proud. Proud that fellow bloggers like me were doing something worthy of public consumption and recognition. Proud that friends, clients and acquaintances were working on things that are passionate to them.
But I’m not so naive that I’m blind to the hate-filled bullshit I’m seeing scattered in comments of said announcements and quite frankly, I’m disgusted. What’s happening is nothing short of a bias against what exactly? A group of parents that are being lumped together with high-school words of “popular” “vapid” and “fake”?
It’s no better than bullying and I won’t stay quiet about it.
Besides, wouldn’t that time and energy be better spent working on your own goals?
If you can’t be supportive about months and years of consistency and hard work by your peers, whether you like them or not, then don’t say anything at all. Look around and see what YOU can accomplish.
Edit: In support of my community, I’d really love it if you went and read this beautiful post by Belinda, once you’re finished commenting here (if you’re gonna. no pressure. really.).
April 29th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
BRAVA and AMEN, sister. This is pretty much the gist of my post later today, too (so, you know, curses on you for making it look like I’m copying you now).
Also, PLEASE keep wiping. MmmKay?
April 29th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
Jealousy breeds the most hateful contempt. When I see comments like that, I tend to want to smack the person who left it. People need to get on board for the big win when it comes to “friendship”.
Hilly’s last blog post..Know When To Walk Away And When To Run….
April 29th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
I have to be honest and admit that there are some people for whom I just canNOT be happy or proud, no matter how much I want to be. I think it’s mostly because of how I feel about them on a day to day basis, though.
I agree that we SHOULD be proud of each other’s accomplishments-even if we do feel a little envy. I’m not above that particular petty emotion, I’m ashamed to say.
And you’re completely right-the denigration is just bullying and bitterness. Luckily I can be envious without being bitter. LOL
EXCELLENT POST.
aka_monty’s last blog post..I’m not nitpicky.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
I hate that so many people feel the need to leave negative comments on personal blogs anyway, if you don’t like what you are reading go somewhere else on the WORLDWIDEWEB. This is just another level of trolls I am sure. Or maybe haters or both. (But not troll haters, because they are reasonable.)
I am proud of what these people have accomplished. I strive to be 1/1000 of that witty and creative, and succeed about .00001% of the time. And that is okay. Because they support me, and I support them - and that is a beautiful thing.
Faith’s last blog post..What? Your Conversations Aren’t All About Poop
April 29th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
A-freaking-men. Jealousy is a nasty thing and luckily it’s something I’ve managed to rise far above. Except last week when White Trash Mom told me her book was being presold at Target and I ran my car into her mailbox. And over her dog. And through her front door. But 5 minutes later I realized I was really damn proud to be her friend and was demanding a signed edition for my wall.
April 29th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Agreed. I’m happy for everyone who’s getting rewarded for their hard work. A pox on all the haters!
miguelina’s last blog post..Update: Relief
April 29th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Amen, Amen, AMEN!!
I have had nothing but joy for the accomplishments of others. I have (unfortunately) been the recipient of some negativity from “real-life” people, but my blog friends? Have been nothing but supportive.
When I read of the accomplishments of others, I pump my fist in the air for them.
Great post, Karen.
Angella’s last blog post..I Hate This Stage
April 29th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
I would be lying if I didn’t feel a tinge of “oh man, I wish that was me” when I see the stories and read the posts. However, more than anything else, it gives me hope (and confidence) that I can do it too. Someday.
Usedtobeme’s last blog post..Titles are stoopid
April 29th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
I love you. You’re amazing. And also? *enter cuss F word here) Amen. Because the thing about those who get books and deals and awards? Well, they’re pretty good. And I’d like to be like them, sure! But more in an inspired way, yaknow? And I’m good with that because it pushes me to greater heights.
Or else I just post photos of me flipping the bird…
Mrs. Flinger’s last blog post..Brutally Honest Monday: The One Where I Spill Family Secrets
April 29th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
April 29th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
LOVE this post. We may debate issues but we ALWAYS get eachother’s backs when it’s time. LOVE IT!
QueenofSpain, Erin Kotecki Vest’s last blog post..Permanent
April 29th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
You know, I will admit to a certai amount of jealousy or envy of other people’s success, but it’s not the venemous kind we’ve seen rearing its ugly head over the last few weeks. It’s more of a “wow, look what they did” and an “if only I had…” kind of thing. It’s more inspirational than anything else.
I’m proud of how far bloggers, and parent bloggers in particular, have come in the last three and a half years. It’s absolutley amazing and I’m lucky to be even a small part of it all.
Sleeping Mommy’s last blog post..I’m bitchy and I need a vacation
April 29th, 2008 at 5:14 pm
DAMN IT. MY COMPUTER KEYBOARD IS DROPPIN LETTERS LIKE CRAZY, TIME TO REBOOT. GRRR
Sleeping Mommy’s last blog post..I’m bitchy and I need a vacation
April 29th, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Last night I was reading Rebecca Woolf’s blog catching up on her book tour and I was practically crying tears of joy. Everytime I see her book cover pop up on blogs I think “score 1 for the mom bloggin sistahs.” I only wish I could have seen her when she was in SF.
Then there’s Clotilde of Chocolate and Zucchini’s SECOND coming out or Heather Armstrong’s new book…or Super Natural Foods, one of my fave cookbooks from Heidi Swanson of 101-Cookbook’s fame…it’s all so incredibly amazing. And yeah! No jealousy–just pride!
I feel the same pride, though, when I read about the cool things BlogHer members are doing in Jenny’s newsletter–and when I see your “designed by” badge all over the blogosphere, too! I think esp with parents, and maybe a little more esp with parents who stay home–anything a member of our/my community can do to be successful, productive, and happy makes me happy too!
April 29th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
You rock. So effing hard. You do.
XOXOXOXOX
Her Bad Mother’s last blog post..Mommy Dearest
April 29th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I guess your perspective depends on whether you believe the universe is abundant and there’s enough good to go around, or it’s limited and that for every person who finds success that’s one more chance that you won’t. Hate to imagine living my life that way.
Nice Karen, thanks.
Mom101’s last blog post..The San Francisco Chronicle
April 29th, 2008 at 7:38 pm
Sadly, there will always be haters no matter what you do.
Fortunately, there’s always a “delete” or “unsubscribe” or “launch all nuclear weapons” button to deal with it.
April 29th, 2008 at 7:45 pm
This post is exactly why I love you (and so many others in our community - YES, our community. I like the way you describe it!) I can ignore the small minded trolls as long as I get to know generous people like you.
Donna’s last blog post..Sushi and the Single Girl
April 29th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
Yes, well said! I swear I’m making a button for BlogHer with a pair of hooker heels and the words “No Guilt”. Because I might be a “tired, pimping whore” in the words of a certain person, but I’m a tired pimping whore who loves her blogs and works hard at them and no one is going to make me feel guilty about that!
love ya
Elizabeth’s last blog post..Winner of the year’s supply of Reddi-wip and Ben&Jerry’s!
April 29th, 2008 at 9:14 pm
I’ve got to tell you that I’m sick to death of the hate mongering in the blog world. Like you, I don’t see why it’s so hard to support our peers; it takes a hell of a lot more energy, and it makes one feel better.
Tense Teacher’s last blog post..Fumble! And Recovery
April 29th, 2008 at 9:15 pm
That was supposed to say “less energy.” Long day.
Tense Teacher’s last blog post..Fumble! And Recovery
April 29th, 2008 at 10:46 pm
Thanks to the wonderful lady who designed Surrender, Dorothy.
April 30th, 2008 at 12:41 am
No time for haters. I’ve been dropping people in my feedreader for all sorts of reasons lately, including that shit.
Karl’s last blog post..No Dolphins Died in Midair Collisions
April 30th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
If I said it nicer, then you cut straight to the point and called them out, and that’s why I love you.
Couldn’t agree more.
Christina’s last blog post..Want A Pretty Flash Drive?
May 2nd, 2008 at 2:14 pm
This post was awesome. Thank you for writing it, although I have felt great support (for the most part) from everyone re: Rockabye. My issue doesn’t come from haters– because, honestly, that’s just life. (Hello, High School.)
My issue comes from those who curse those who work their asses off when they themselves spend all their energy talking shit. Nothing comes easy in life, that’s for sure. Every author with a book out there right now has been rejected a hundred times before finally making a sale. And will likely be rejected a hundred times more.
Word, mama. Keep rockin’ the awesome.
GirlsGoneChild’s last blog post..Chapter Eight: Impromptu Readings, Four Legged-Friends
May 11th, 2008 at 3:30 am
I’m usually positive and yet things seem so hard sometimes, I have a hard time not showing my edge. I read the post and it grounded me, at least for awhile..thanks…I’m smiling..
Dorothy from grammology
remember to call gram
http://www.grammology.com